Moms Need Me Time Beyond Mother’s Day

open book with coffee

As Mother’s Day approaches, new moms everywhere are probably realizing the same thing I’ve known for the past 15 years: We do a lot of stuff for everyone else and very little for ourselves. But that needs to change – moms need me time so that we can be the best we can be.

While you’re running your kids to baseball practice and dance class, taking out the trash, checking homework, paying bills, stopping at the grocery store, working outside the home, taking the dog to the groomers, packing lunches, and the list goes on and on, remember it’s okay not to be Super Mom. Yeah, I know people say that, but do we really believe it?

I say it, but I still find myself trying to juggle everything. As a single mother of two active children (ages 16 and 12), a career and a house to keep up, I’m half-crazed most of the time. It’s a wonder I can really be competent at anything. But there’s one thing I’ve learned and started to adhere to several years ago: Moms need me time.

So whenever I can fit it in — like when I’m not taking my daughter driving, which seems to be all the time — I plan things. I find it works to have events and activities to look forward to. Here are my five suggestions for simple things you can do to treat yourself any day of the year:

1. Relish the relaxation. This doesn’t mean you have to find a top-of-the-line spa and spend a lot of money. Even a manicure or pedicure can make you feel brand new.

2. Indulge in some entertainment. Grab a friend (or go solo) and hit the cinema. And, yes, absolutely indulge on the buttery deliciousness of movie theater popcorn!

Or maybe a quiet corner with a good book is all you need? Or a marathon of “Breaking Bad” on Netflix? Whatever it is, do it. The distraction from every day chaos is comforting.

3. Buy yourself something special. Yes, kids need summer clothes and all that, but when’s the last time you bought yourself a new outfit? I tend to be much more productive when I hit the mall by myself. Of course, having friends with you offers a great second opinion in the dressing room. If you’re watching your wallet, even an hour to browse a store’s home furnishings section is a good getaway.

4. Let the music play. Update your music play list and listen to songs that make you feel good. Hearing certain songs can take you right back to those high-school years. (Did someone say ‘80s music?) Or take it a step further and check out a local band.

5. Bring on the Bunco. Even something as simple as dinner with friends can perk you up. I’m in a Bunco league with 11 other women. (I know that kind of makes me sound lame, but it’s a blast). We meet once a month at a different person’s house (that way you only have to host once a year) to play Bunco, eat dinner and chat it up. But do whatever works for you – it can be a book club (which I’m also in) or just a one-day outing. Fact: Giggling with your girlfriends just feels good.

Have a lovely Mother’s Day, and remember–you don’t need to wear a cape, you’re already super.

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